As much as I love the podcast My Favorite Murder, I didn’t have high expectations for their debut book, Stay Sexy & Don’t Get Murdered. The podcast with a cult following is entertaining as hell, and I’ve been following Karen Kilgariff and Georgia Hardstark for some time now and although I love their podcast and hearing from them every week, I was very hesitant to get excited about this book. Boy was I wrong.

The book is a joint memoir written from both of their perspectives in sections framed by popular sayings on their show like “stay out of the forest,” and “f*** politeness,” urging women to protect themselves first. The stories these women choose to tell are enlightening and explain how society has shaped them into the people they are today, for better and for worse. Not lacking in curses and exclamations, the book stays true to their authentic style. You can tell they have written the chapters because as a fan, you’ve been listening to their voice, their point of view, for so long.

On the surface, Karen and Georgia have led privileged lives. Two girls from California with middle class families. I’ve led a privileged life as well and I have always said that my life is not something I think anyone would want to read about. Middle class white girl. Not creative. There’s not enough grit. There’s not enough hardship. Karen and Georgia have changed my mind about that.

Karen and Georgia’s life affirming experiences could be considered “white people problems” from afar. Karen details her struggles with alcoholism, speed and diet pills. Georgia, her issues stemming from her parents divorce, childhood rebellion and drugs, anxiety, and ADHD. Both of them struggled with eating disorders. It all sounds basic and privileged but after engrossing myself in the story there were some extremely hard hitting stories that brought up emotions that I recognized within myself. And yeah, maybe some of that comes from privilege, but suffering is suffering. Struggles with mental health are real struggles. Hearing two women validate these struggles and honor them as difficult and painful was refreshing. They don’t preface anything with “I know people have it worse” or “I’m sorry for complaining, I know I’m lucky.” They speak their truth without apology. Which, I realized, is not just what we want as females, but what we need.

We need women who are going to bite the bullet and speak up about the things that may seem mundane and small, but that are factors of our lives that make them hard.

Georgia and Karen are such good role models. And I say that without anything held back. They teach us that being yourself is the most important truth and that doing that isn’t easy. Reading this book felt like getting a hug from a best friend, someone that is very much like yourself. And that’s why I won’t doubt myself, or my story, again. Because if Karen and Georgia can tell theirs, so can I. And I know they’d be happy to hear that.